Society tells us that perfectionism is a good thing. Perhaps you too have been praised and rewarded for your high capacity, high standards, and meticulous work. You may have also believed that perfectionism was the same as trying your best and showing your commitment...
When your own wellbeing is compromised, it’s incredibly difficult to look after your children’s wellbeing. Especially in the longer term. Self care is not a luxury. It’s not selfish and it doesn’t mean you don’t love your children as much as yourself. Self care is something all mums need and deserve. Think “me too” rather than “me first”. I am passionate about making self care manageable and realistic in the midst of the chaos of motherhood. Here you’ll find lots of inspiration, tips and examples to help you look after yourself. You matter too.
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Have we got the definition of a strong woman wrong?
How would you define a strong woman? Perhaps you might use some of the following descriptions: Physically strong Confident Hard to persuade Unflappable Resilient Determined Independent In control Focused on her goals. I used to think that being a strong woman...
How our children invite us to learn and grow
Have you ever heard that saying that goes something like “I was a much better parent before I had children”? I love it. Parenting is often much harder than we expect. We imagine that parenting will involve joyous afternoons at the park, quiet snuggles on the lounge (I...
Using your values to create a rich and fulfilling life
Do you know what your personal values are? Defining and aligning to our personal values can help us feel motivated, inspired and live a rich and meaningful life. When we know what’s most important to us we can look for ways to have more of this in our lives. In...
How to ask for help
You know you need some help and you’ve decided you’re going to ask for it. That’s a huge step in itself. Asking for help can be really hard, especially for mothers in modern society where there are some very unrealistic expectations placed on women to do it all,...
Why it’s so hard to ask for help
“Can you help me?” Four little words. They seem so simple yet mothers everywhere find them near impossible to say. What makes it hard is the meaning we attribute to asking for help. Without that meaning, asking for help is a neutral activity, neither positive or...
Automatic Negative Thoughts: How to Identify and Manage Them
Automatic negative thoughts (ANTs) are stories that we tell ourselves that aren’t necessarily true. They are distortions or negative interpretations of ourselves, what is happening around us, the past or the future, based on our beliefs and assumptions. ANTs happen...
The seasons of our cycle: How to go with the flow throughout the month
We all know that if you have a healthy reproductive cycle, we have a period every 28 days or so, but did you know that there is a constant evolution happening inside of you each month - the way we feel, act, burn energy in the middle of the month is very different to...
Why mothers need to speak up instead of staying silent
Have there been times when you have you kept quiet when you had something to say? For example, when... Someone crossed your boundary or hurt you? Another child mistreated your child? You didn’t want to do something you were being asked to do? You didn’t agree? Someone...
The truth about the difficult emotions of motherhood
Sadness, burnout, fear, guilt, anxiety, loneliness, frustration, anger, resentment, shame, embarrassment, disgust. Mothers feel them. But often we don’t like to talk about them. What will people think? If perfect mum is always composed, in control, calm, happy, on top...
Think you might be a perfectionist? 10 signs to look for
Perfectionism is patterns of thinking and behaviours driven by the constant need to be or appear perfect (without flaws). It could also be described as the need to avoid being inadequate (anything less than perfect). For many years I proudly called myself a...
How to interrupt the pattern of self blame
When my son was 4, he was playing in the playground after kindergarten and decided to give the monkey bars a try. He always watched the other children swinging across but still liked me to hold him as he moved his arms from bar to bar. This time he wanted to do it...