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Nearly every mother I speak to wants strategies to stay calm and deal with stressful situations more effectively. We are mothering and living in stressful, uncertain times with incredible amounts of pressure placed on us to live up to unrealistic expectations. Our...
A man walks through the door and greets his wife. “What did you do today?”, he asks. “Nothing” she says in a weary tone. “I didn’t get anything done!” Truth is, she’s hardly taken a breath. She’s spent her entire day cleaning and tidying, preparing food, organising,...
Have you ever called yourself a bad mum, either out loud or in your mind? I certainly have and I know many other mums have too. I’ve been thinking about this label that we use. Why is it so prevalent? What does it even mean? And what is the impact of using it? I’m...
How would you define a strong woman? Perhaps you might use some of the following descriptions: Physically strong Confident Hard to persuade Unflappable Resilient Determined Independent In control Focused on her goals. I used to think that being a strong woman...
Automatic negative thoughts (ANTs) are stories that we tell ourselves that aren’t necessarily true. They are distortions or negative interpretations of ourselves, what is happening around us, the past or the future, based on our beliefs and assumptions. ANTs happen...
Have there been times when you have you kept quiet when you had something to say? For example, when... Someone crossed your boundary or hurt you? Another child mistreated your child? You didn’t want to do something you were being asked to do? You didn’t agree? Someone...
Sadness, burnout, fear, guilt, anxiety, loneliness, frustration, anger, resentment, shame, embarrassment, disgust. Mothers feel them. But often we don’t like to talk about them. What will people think? If perfect mum is always composed, in control, calm, happy, on top...
Perfectionism is patterns of thinking and behaviours driven by the constant need to be or appear perfect (without flaws). It could also be described as the need to avoid being inadequate (anything less than perfect). For many years I proudly called myself a...
When my son was 4, he was playing in the playground after kindergarten and decided to give the monkey bars a try. He always watched the other children swinging across but still liked me to hold him as he moved his arms from bar to bar. This time he wanted to do it...
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I’m fascinated by volcanoes. My heart raced with excitement and awe when I stood in the hot steam rising from the ground, walked across kilometres of lava rock, and flew in a helicopter over the crater of the active volcano in Hawaii. When...
This is part 2 of my 2-part blog post series on staying calm in the moment. Part 1 contains the first 16 strategies. You can find it here. I certainly needed my strategies for staying calm this week. How about you? Every mum experiences times when she doesn't feel...